Yeah, decided to quit my a few days ago. I told everyone this on monday morning.
Well it was surprising. I think I got fired right after I said I was quitting. It was just "OK" and "how soon are you going to vacate the desk?" Okay. No problem. So I didn't get my planned 30 days. But of course it made sense, I had no product area that I was responsible for. They also answered my question about where I let them down, but it wasn't too hard to hear, not exactly new information. I was spectacular, but didn't accomplish a thing. I was a door to another universe from the perspective of what the team was actually doing. A lone gunner. I know you can't do stuff alone, but I didn't realize this could happen in a team. A small one in fact.
It's all good. The rest of the day has been feeling hopeful and grateful for the 3 months I can stretch the last paycheck. Feels like having my life back finally. There time to actually consider opportunities. Today we had a startup meeting for a very new idea. I hung out with my mother and talked about life and stuff. I sat around for a little while just to enjoy my own presence. Great time. Too bad it's temporary. In a few months I'll be back to hustling and stressing myself out.
My mom made me promise not to take any commitments longer than a day for a whole month. What a wonderful challenge. I can explore all I want, but can't say I'm actually in on anything. This feels like freedom. Maybe it'll still not work. Maybe I say maybe too much. What's for sure is even if all goes to shit I got people I can hang out with. Don't have to worry about starving.
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